It's Ally Week!

So it is Ally Week 2011! Groups across the country and even across the world are hosting events to celebrate Allies and gain new ones. Are you going to an event? Let us know on here. I can proudly say that I will be attending GLSEN Northern Virginia's first EVER Ally Week event, the Students Allied for Safer Schools Conference. If you are a high school student in the Northern Virginia, please join us!

Students Allied for Safer Schools Conference

Celebrate being an Ally, and if you need help, you know I'm here for you ;)

Always Nice...

It's always nice to know that celebrities and the media are helping the cause. Thanks to the NBA, Chaz Bono, and all of the others out there supporting GLSEN's cause. Couldn't do it without you!

Here is a story about GLSEN aired a couple of hours ago on Entertainment Tonight:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFy_vhAawc8

The News

So I've been reading the news and there have been a great amount of attacks on the LGBT community recently. Unfortunately, it's something that the LGBT and Allied community is all too familiar with. What's important is that when something comes up in the news about the LGBT community, talk to people about it. Spreading awareness is the greatest thing you can do. You have no idea how many lives you can save by people just knowing that you are out there and that you care.

It's also important to thank people who are raising awareness. I just wrote a letter to Rise Against to thank them for the song, "Make It Stop". I'll repost the music video again for those who didn't see it before. Hopefully they read and they can further understand what they are doing to help the world.

It is bands like Rise Against that make me happy to keep doing what I am doing. It is always nice to know people of influence care, especially when they do it as well as Rise Against has.

Wake Me Up When September Ends

So many students are going back to school soon if they haven't already. At this point, most of my friends are back at college and high schools (at least in Virginia) are going back within the coming weeks.

Last September, tragedy struck the country multiple times. Several students committed suicide within one month and many of those suicides were related to some form of LGBT bullying. The bullying reminded me of the song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends", by Green Day. While the song may carry a different meaning than the real-life events that I am referring, I certainly wished September never happened at all.

September is a horrible month for many youth. It means returning to the school where they have been bullied for years for the same thing. For many, it might mean going to a new school and immediately finding it difficult to fit in.

The point is, no matter what the situation, September shouldn't be this way. Going back to school should be good and as cheesy as it sounds, students should be happy to come back to a school to see all of their friends and return to the classroom for an education that is unhindered by feelings of loneliness and humiliation.

I am writing this as a call to everyone. Please help us make this September better by being there for every student. Whether you are a parent, a teacher, an administrator, a bus driver, a custodian, or another student, BE THERE. It is our responsibility to help each other out. One of the central teachings of Judaism (not becoming a religious preacher here) is Tikkun Olam, or repairing the world. I believe it is crucial to repairing the world that everyone feels safe and comfortable in their own skin.

I myself have just returned to college with a new energy to helping stop bullying. Thanks to several conferences and workshops over the summer, I have new ideas to help as many people as I can.

If you are in need of help or you think someone is a victim of bullying, please talk to someone. You can contact me or anyone you think can help. Don't wait. As we found out last summer, help might come just too late.

Please take advantage of the resources available in your area or online to help yourself or others out. If you have any questions, I am here for you as well thousands of other people working towards the same goal I am. All you have to do is ask :)

Have a safe year.

This blog is a safe space.

Introducing the Fairfax Open House

I am always looking for new groups that help students and are a resource for youth to go to. When I was younger, I was bullied for being Jewish and I turned to the Anti-Defamation League for help. This group, Fairfax Open House, is a new group for LGBT Jewish teens in the Northern Virginia area and I believe it is truly great that it has been created. I am an activist and a straight ally myself because I understand what it feels like to be bullied. I am proud that a group has been created in this area for Jewish teens who also face LGBT bullying.

Please check out their website for more information. They are a brand new group so stay tuned to hear about their success! http://www.fairfaxopenhouse.org/

What to Do Over the Summer

So school is out for summer! Awesome!

However, last school year we saw that summer's end can be tragic for many student around the country and around the world. In September of 2010, we saw several high-profile suicides in the LGBT youth community.

Many students (while they won't admit it publicly) like going back to school to see all of their friends. However, too large of a percentage of students are scared to go back. For many, the pressure is too great and they end up dropping out early in the year or they consider ending their life completely.

This is something that has to be stopped and the only way to do that is to work during the summer. Work can be done and in many ways it is easier since you don't have to think about school.

Right now, I am planning out events for the next school year so I can make sure everything goes smoothly. I am also working out details for creating county-wide GSAs throughout the Northern Virginia area. My hope is that by the time students return to school in August/September, the GSAs will already by up and running. At no point, should students have no where to go. It isn't right.

Summer planning is crucial. It is the best time to look at the past year and address any concerns and improve for the future. It's time to take charge and make sure all the holes are filled. Expand your GSA's reach, come up with fresh, new ideas, and talk to current members of the GSA to see what they liked and what they want.

If you are doing work on a community level, summer is a good time to publicize your work. Students (no offense) spend hours on Facebook over the summer so let them know what you are doing! Let the LGBT community know that you are there.

For so many members of the LGBT community and for students all over who are being bullied, it means so much to know someone is there for them.

Summer is the time to get things done! Go change the world :)

Happy 4th of July!

As we celebrate the United States of America's Independence Day, we have to remember that not everyone feels the same freedoms we do. ALL people in this country deserve to be free and this Declaration of Independence from the Huffington post states it well.

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all people, regardless of race, gender, religion, immigration or economic status, sexual orientation or gender identity, are created equal, that they are endowed by their government with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. This liberty and happiness shall extend to all laws that give rights and responsibilities to adult people in a committed relationship."

Read the article here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tracy-baim/a-declaration-of-gay-independence_b_888114.html

Great new Rise Against Video!

It is amazing bands like this that can save lives. I truly believe that music does save lives. Linkin Park did it for me and I hope Rise Against does it for many. This is one of the only songs I've seen (correct me if I'm wrong) that specifically is about LGBT bullying.

Enjoy!

Bang bang go the coffin nails, like a breath exhaled,

Been gone forever.

It seems just like yesterday, how did I miss the red flags raised?

Think back to the days we laughed.

We braved these bitter storms together.

Brought to his knees he cried,

But on his feet he died.

What God would damn a heart?

And what God drove us apart?

What God could make it stop?

Let this end.

Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.

It's come to this,

A weightless step.

On the way down singing,

Bang bang from the closet walls,

The schoolhouse halls,

The shotgun's loaded.

Push me and I'll push back.

I'm done asking, I demand.

From a nation under God,

I feel it's love like a cattle prod.

Born free, but still they hate.

Born me, no I can't change.

It's always darkest just before the dawn.

So stay awake with me, let's prove them wrong.

Make it stop.

Let this end,

Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.

It's come to this,

A weightless step.

On the way down singing,

Woah, woah.

The cold river washed him away,

But how could we forget.

Gathering the candles, but not their tongues.

And too much blood has flown from the wrists,

Of the children shamed for those they chose to kiss.

Who will rise to stop the blood?

We're calling for,

Insisting on, a different beat, yeah.

A brand new song.

(Tyler Clementi, age 18.

Billy Lucas, age 15.

Harrison Chase Brown, age 15

Cody J. Barker, age 17

Seth Walsh, age 13.)

Make it stop,

Let this end.

This life chose me, I'm not lost in sin.

But proud I stand of who I am,

I plan to go on living.

Make it stop,

let this end,

all these years pushed to the ledge,

but proud I stand, of who I am,

I plan to go on living

Keeping Up To Date

One way to make sure you are supporting the LGBT population is to keep current as much as possible. Occasionally I will post things you should check out to fill your bookshelf and fill your mind.

For right now, I am recommending the book, It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living edited by Dan Savage and Terry Miller. Dan Savage is the founder of the It Gets Better Project and this book is certainly worth checking out.

Here is a description:
Every story can change a life. 

Growing up isn't easy. Many young people face daily tormenting and bullying, making them feel like they have nowhere to turn. This is especially true for LGBT kids and teens who often hide their sexuality for fear of bullying. Without other openly gay adults and mentors in their lives, they can't imagine what their future may hold. In many instances, gay and lesbian adolescents are taunted - even tortured - simply for being themselves. 

After a number of tragic suicides by LGBT students who were bullied in school, syndicated columnist and author Dan Savage uploaded a video to YouTube with his partner Terry Miller to inspire hope for LGBT youth facing harassment. Speaking openly about the bullying they suffered as teenagers, and how they both went on to lead rewarding adult lives, their video launched the It Gets Better Project YouTube channel and initiated a worldwide phenomenon. With over 6,000 videos posted and over 20 million views in the first three months alone, the world has embraced the opportunity to provide personal, honest and heartfelt support for LGBT youth everywhere. 

It Gets Better is a collection of expanded essays and new material from celebrities, everyday people and teens who have posted videos of encouragement, as well as new contributors who have yet to post videos to the site. While many of these teens couldn't see a positive future for themselves, we can. We can show LGBT youth the levels of happiness, potential and positivity their lives will reach if they can just get through their teen years. By sharing these stories, It Gets Better reminds teenagers in the LGBT community that they are not alone - and it WILL get better.

Click on the picture for more info.

This Is Why I Do What I Do...

Posts like this are why I do what I do. Some members of my community obviously do not understand the depth of what is going on around the country. As a straight ally, it is my job to set the record straight. Thank you all for supporting me and encouraging me to keep on going!

Here is the post. Read with caution:
http://www.bvbl.net/index.php/2011/03/26/battlefield-hs-on-display/

Here is my response:

Let me put all of the comments threatening investigations and everything else to rest. As a senior at Battlefield High School, I created the Battlefield GSA. It was not created by a teacher, an administrator, a school board member, or even a gay student. It was created by me, a straight, Caucasian, sensible student at Battlefield High School.

The posters were created because, regardless of your position on equality, there are students at Battlefield everyday who identify as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, or Transgender. They are made fun of ruthlessly. Several of them have even threatened to commit suicide. I am not here to argue whether you support gay marriage. I am here to argue for a club that I created so these students can stop getting harassed.

I agree that students are in school to learn, but how can they learn if they don’t even know if they will make it through the school day. I personally have seen students made fun of for all reasons. I don’t know about you, but once “children” start killing themselves because of things being said at school, we have a problem.

I am attacked very often for trying to advance the gay agenda, and that’s fine if you want to believe that. However, let me present you with the reality. As a Jewish student in Prince William County Schools, I was verbally attacked on a regular basis. I wasn’t attacked because I was gay, I was attacked because I was Jewish, short, and “too intelligent.” On one occasion, I was thrown to the ground and kicked around.

I tried to commit suicide three times before I reached high school. Luckily, an organization named the Anti-Defamation League came to my aid and brought me out of a phase that I thought would end my life. After that, I vowed that I would not let the same things happen to my peers and the students that would follow me.

As part of my effort to make sure all students feel safe, I created the Battlefield GSA to specifically make sure students that identify as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, or Transgender would feel safe in their own school. They deserve more than to be walking around everyday fearing their own classmates. There are several students in the club who identify as straight. No one is there because it is a “Sex Club.” The students are there because they see that bullying is an issue and they are sick of it.

It is time for everyone to face facts. Whether you like it or not, bullying has become an issue in schools across the country and it is time something be done to stop it. It is not a Gay Issue, a Jewish Issue, a Hispanic Issue, IT IS A HUMAN ISSUE. Stop denying what you know is really the truth.

I thank you to all of the aware members of my community reading this post. White Cotton, continue what you are doing, it is people like you that make me proud to live in the area I do.

How are you going to be a straight ally?

So I haven't updated for a while. Sorry about that folks...

Anyway, my goal here is to help share resources for those interested in being allies of the LGBT community. It is also for members of the LGBT community to find allies. I thought I would help by sharing some tips about being an ally.

1. Don't assume anything
1. Many people assume that all LGBT people have exactly the same feelings (relationship-wise). This understandable because we grow up learning about definite sexes and definite sexual orientations. It is important to know that both are fluid. Never assume that because someone currently identifies as gay, they love the same sex all the time and that's all they think about.
2. Feel free to ask
1. Most members of the LGBT community don't mind be asked about their sexuality. If they do, they'll let you know. If you feel uncomfortable with what pronouns to use or how to address them properly, just ask. Most are going to give an honest answer. It's better than going out on a limb and accidentally offending someone.
3. Do some research
1. If being an ally is new to you, do some research. Check out what terms mean and what terms you shouldn't use. There are definitely some "no-no" terms that many people think are okay but the LGBT community finds offensive. This is another situation where it's good to ask someone who knows some stuff already (which hopefully is why you're reading this!)
4. Don't always assume you are offending someone
1. I can even be accused of this. Definitely be careful of what you say, but don't always be afraid to speak up because you think you are offending someone. If you never ask any questions or let people know when you're uncomfortable, you'll never learn from each other.
5. Be an ally all the time.
1. Unfortunately, we are surrounded by people who are unaware that they are offending the LGBT community with some of the words they say. It's usually not a good idea to yell at anyone, but if you hear something offensive, speak up! Say, "Hey! That could be offensive to someone." or something similar. People tend to be on guard when they are with someone who they know is a member of the LGBT community, but they let things slide when they're not around. Be an ally all the time!

So there are 5 tips for now. More are coming! If you have questions, comment on here on send me a message. I'm hoping this can be a forum where I answer questions on a regular basis :)

As always, thanks for reading!

What Are YOU Going to Do to End the Silence? UPDATE

So GLSEN Northern Virginia is doing a Day of Silence Video Campaign entitled, "What are YOU Going to Do to End the Silence?"

Watch my video here and then create your own response!

What Are YOU Going to Do to End the Silence?

Here is a how-to on recording a video for YouTube. You'll need a YouTube account either way you choose. Go here to sign up. It's free.

Using webcam to record video

There are two ways to use your webcam with YouTube:

1. You can record video using the software that came with the camera and then upload it to YouTube (with or without making edits)

OR

2. You can also record directly to YouTube using the My Webcam feature.

To record a video directly to YouTube, you'll need to have:

• A YouTube account
• A confirmed email address
• A webcam or camcorder attached to your computer

If you have all of these things, follow the steps below to upload to YouTube directly from your webcam or camera:

1. Sign in to YouTube. Make sure your camera is attached to the computer and working.
2. Go to the Record From Webcam page (http://www.youtube.com/my_webcam).
3. Enter the information about your video in the left column. This is required before you begin recording.
4. If you get a message that says 'www.youtube.com is requesting access to your camera and microphone,' click the Allow button. If you don't see a picture in the record section, you may need to choose a different video source from the video dropdown in the Record Video window.
5. Once you see a picture coming from your camera, click the Record button to start recording your video.
6. When you're finished recording, click the Done button if you're satisfied with your video, or click the Re-Record button if you'd like to try recording it again.

When you click the Done button, your video will automatically be uploaded to YouTube and begin processing. You can edit information about the video by going to your My Videos page.
If you're having trouble using webcam, you may want to make sure any firewall software you may have is allowing connection to our server. If you're on a corporate or school network the connection could be blocked and you may want to check with your network administrator to find out what restrictions your network's under.

My Video for the Anti-Defamation League

Here is a video about me for the Anti-Defamation League.
In case you cannot view the video on here, this is the link:
A World of Difference Institute: David Aponte

© Video Copyright 2011 Anti-Defamation League

What's Going On?

I think it would be best to start off with what's going on right now.

Currently, most states have bullying policies on the books, but they lack the language to protect students based on sexual orientation or gender identity/expression. Most policies simply leave out the words "sexual orientation and gender identity/expression", while many don't even list the groups of protected students. Many simply say that bullying is not tolerated. This is referred to as a zero-tolerance policy.

Zero-tolerance policies have been proven to be ineffective and, in some cases, used against LGBT students. What we all need to push right now are comprehensive, enumerated policies.

For example, the Safe Schools Improvement Act is going through the Senate right now.
Click here for information on it: http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=s112-506&tab=summary

Many Senators aren't on board and LGBT students across the country need our help.
Go here to find out who your Senator is, and how to contact them.http://www.contactingthecongress.org/

Here's a blog for all the allies...

So, as many know, I am a straight ally that is a strong advocate for gay rights. I decided to create this blog for all the allies out there and all of the members of the LGBT community looking for allies.

Each blog post is going to talk about ways to be an ally, ways to advocate for the LGBT community, or ways to support equality.

I'm hoping to make this website friendly to everyone, including those who would like to learn more about LGBT issues around the world.

Ask any question you want! This is a place to learn, but please use good discretion and do not offend anyone that may be reading the blog.